I don't know why I stayed 138
by KuraiOfAnagura
Summary: A little AkuRoku Oneshot I wrote to celebrate our most favourite date! It's always been hard if someone of them came back from a field mission seriously injured...


**I don't know why I stayed**

It's always been hard if someone of them came back from a field mission seriously injured. Some scratches and cuts and even broken finger could of course appear on every mission (like Luxord, who'd managed to break his fingers in Agraba, while distracting the people with his card tricks.) and those little wounds healed fast, leaving no scar in it's wake. Laxaeus, with his literally down-to-earth logic, had once assumed that wounds paired two different feelings of pain. One coming from the body, a physical sensation even noticeable with just synapses and neurons connecting the torn flesh and the brain, and the second one coming from the heart. The terror of being wounded, the fear that comes with spilled blood. And those who had no heart could not feel that pain. Perhaps this was the reason their wounds healed in a comparable fast time. The lacking of the heart was steel to their bodies, or at least this was V theory.

But the pain still remained.

And as Demyx and Xigbar appeared out of a dark portal into the Hall of the Empty Melodies, with a blood saturated Axel on a stretcher between them, something very tiny and little died inside of the Key of Destiny. The pair had already passed him, making their way down to Vexen's lab, which was equally used as a surgery room, infirmary wing and, mostly, lab for dangerous experiments. Roxas still stared on the trail of smaller and bigger dark red spots on the white white floor. Staring at them so intensely made his eyes water and the floor appeared to glow even brighter. Following an inner demand he opened a portal at the same place as Demyx and appeared right before the thick iron door that lead to Vexen's reign. What had it been that made him follow his injured companion? It's been such a strong urge.

Perhaps the faint trace of a memory?

The door opened silently and unnoticed, mostly because the inside of the room was filled with a cacophony of screams. Axel screamed out of pain, Xigbar tried to scream Axel down and Vexen screamed orders at the top of his screechy voice. The most disturbing thing in the picture though was Demyx, who, so much unlike his aquatic character, appeared to be the rock in the surf. He was calm and he stood unmoving next to the table Axel was laying on. He held his one hand in his both and stared silently and with great force on the number VIII's eyes. He was also the one who noticed Roxas. Roxas had to admit later that he'd never been more certain about Demyx' strength than in this very moment. The sea green eyes bored right into that something that was inside of him and shook him to the core. Suddenly he had the feeling that something was not right here. With a hand Demyx gestured him to come by his side and Roxas would've rather gone through hell than disobey a Demyx with such a look in his eyes. The most cheerful member took his hand with one of his own and laid Axel's into it. Roxas winced as the other hand suddenly tightened around his in a painful, desperate grip.

"DEMYX! GO! Get Zexion!" Vexen finally placed a acceptable order and Demyx stood up to his full size.  
"Don't leave him alone. Not now. _Not even one of us should ho that way alone_." Roxas'd never expected such words from Demyx and again something crumbled down painful in the left side of his chest and faded away, leaving a metallic taste in his mouth.

Axel's scream ripped him out of his trance and back to the bitter reality.  
Roxas bent down like Demyx had done before. At Vexen's order Xigbar took place in front of him, pressing Axel's other arm down, muttering some curses under his breath. Xaldin, called by the screams, stabilized the redhead's legs, preventing them from wildly kicking around. Roxas looked in Axel's face. The normally pale redhead was now white as the walls of the Castle that Never Was. His eyes rolled around uncontrollably and a faint grey layer of sweat covered his face and neck. With a fast movement Vexen ripped the black cloak in pieces, revealing the bare chest that was marred with a deep, long slash. It began on the middle of his right breast going down his entire side, ending on the upper thigh. Vexen muttered something along the lines of, "It's hit the artery," as he examined the destruction. Axel's breathing was heavy and whistling and erratic. He threw his head from one side to the other, stretching his upper body up to just fall down on the table.

And he pressed Roxas' hand.

Roxas had to struggle to keep his face in place. Axel had been his best partner on missions and the person he'd spent most of his free time with. To see him now in a state when his behavior couldn't be differed from those of a mere animal's was... disturbing. Suddenly Axel's head flew to the right and those green eyes found Roxas'. All he could focus on was the blond and that was enough.  
The whistling sound stayed, but the breaths weren't deep any more but flat and weak. Axel didn't struggle any more but lay down limply on the table, simply staring at Roxas. And Roxas kept Demyx' advice in mind and stayed there. Why, he didn't know himself. Something made him stay. Something in his left chest. The calmer Axel got the more the hectic of the older nobodies grew. Vexen hurried from the table to a closet and back again, Xaldin and Xigbar already arguing over something.

This was the first time Roxas saw the black spots.

First he thought it was the dust or a trick played by his eyes. But after a blink he knew that the flesh of the wound was starting to fall off in little black dots of dust. Very black dust though. Perhaps it was his instincts or perhaps it the was "HOLLY FUCKING SHIT!!" from Xigbar that told him that those black spots were something bad.

"We can't bear to lose one. Save him. No matter what the cost."

The voice was suddenly behind them. Xemnas standing in all his authority in the lab, filling it with it even in the very last corner. His emotionless and glassy eyes looked down at Axel's figure, his expression showing how much he disliked the situation and making clear whose fault this has been. The black dots began to appear in a faster rhythm, more and more chunks of torn flesh transformed into that strange form of floating dust. The other numbers, sans for Xemnas who was silent as a stone, began to panic and Vexen did the only thing that came into his mind.  
He froze the whole left side of the fire wilder into a thick block of glassy ice.  
The bond that'd formed between Roxas and Axel was torn abruptly as Axel bent up violently with a dark and loud scream. Now it was that scream that shook Roxas to the core. It told him more stories than words ever could. It was filled with agony, yes, but most of all it was a scream of pure pain.

"Where the hell is Zexion!" Xaldin roared over him, not able to beat him.  
"I'm already here," the Cloaked Schemer floated into the room like mist over wet grass, taking place at the head side of the table and placed his hand right over the screaming man's eyes. The screaming died down fast and everything in Axel went limp in an instant. Roxas could feel it, and he didn't even need the loose hand in his. With a prickle the feeling crept back in his digits.

His eyes were green and wide, but broken.

Axel looked up at the ceiling, his vision cloudy, his mind obviously in another world created by their illusionist. Today was also the first time Roxas saw a nobody crying.  
"Just a side effect. This always happens, yet I haven't found out why yet." Zexion muttered to their Superior, already on his way out. He passed Demyx, who stood next to the door. Demyx observed the scenery with the same strong eyes as before and as his gaze fell on Roxas, the thirteenth member was reminded of a very dark and deep and powerful lake. Suddenly Demyx bent down and put his head between his knees, shoulders hunched he whispered something to the affect of, "oh gawd, I'm _sick_..." The other's relaxed as well, the tension falling from their shoulders in nearly visible bricks. Xemnas already long gone.

"Any idea what got him?" Xigbar asked into the round. Xaldin just shrugged, but Vexen shoved him violently away from the table. "We will know when I've healed him. Now go away and let me doing my work!" Now it was Xigbar's time to shrug, he portaled out, followed by Xaldin, to tell the other members.  
Roxas didn't know why he'd stayed there all night.

He sat next to Demyx and watched how Vexen dove into the ice and cleaned and sewed the wound, how he melted the block bit by bit to stop the bleeding. It took him several hours and two tantrums. When he was finished he looked paler and more tired than usual and slept in his chambers instead of the lab for a long time. Yet Roxas still didn't know why he stayed. The lab was cold, the chair hard and the new found agitation in Demyx was unnerving.

But he stayed.

He didn't know why he stayed even after Demyx had fallen asleep. He didn't know why he placed himself right next to the sleeping Axel. He didn't know why he placed a kiss on those still pale lips as they'd started to squirm.  
"Hey..." Axel tried to focus him with blurry eyes as he finally awakened. "...Thanks... for saving me..," his voice was so weak. Not comparable in any point to the roar of flame that normally lived into his words. The faint whisper reminded him of the last tiny flames on a dying ember.  
"I didn't do anything."  
"...You stayed."  
"I don't know why I did so."  
"...I'm glad... you did..."  
Roxas gripped his chest and a pained expression appeared on his face. Axel just nodded lightly.  
And this was also the first time Roxas felt his heart. We always just see what we have when we're about to loose it. Roxas didn't loose his heart in that night, he kissed the injured man again and went to sleep with their fingers entwined.

_... the whisper of a faint Memory..._

* * *

**a Happy belayed AkuRoku-Day to you all! I've updated this on dA on 13th of August, so it isn't that belayed... I guess **

**Vote for European Dates! They make Roxas TOP!**


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